I was surfing the net and came across this gem....
I'm so fat that...
When I dance I make the band skip.
My cereal bowl comes with a lifeguard.
When I go to the zoo the elephants throw me peanuts.
My graduation picture was a aerial photograph.
My driver's license says picture continued on other side.
When I ran away they had to use all 4 sides of the milk carton.
When I get in an elevator it HAS to go DOWN!
Instead of being born with a silver spoon I was born with a silver shovel in my mouth.
They have to grease the door frames and put a Twinkie on the other side to get me through.
I could become rich and sell shade.
My belly button doesn't have lint -- it has sweaters.
And you think YOU'RE fat?
That got me thinking that it is time I did something before the aforementioned person is me...as I have mentioned in my earlier post on resolutions, weigh loss is kind of like my no-1 priority this year...
Today I began taking baby steps towards the ideal weight...
To begin with I would like to mention that I am 10 kgs above the weight recommended in the insurance charts for my height...there is no way I am mentioning my height...so you can keep guessing what I weigh at the moment...
I have stopped eating the soda rich food that they serve in the office canteen ...for evening hunger pangs I keep a packet of instant soup handy... I know... I know... pacakaged food is not good... but comeon guys I need to wean off these foods slowly... stopped eating chocolates (OK, OK...the past two days I have not had any, honest)...SOB...SOB...HIC...SOB...SOB...WAAAAAAAAAH...SOB...SOB...
I went out this morning and collected the book "French women don't get fat". I had ordered this book a couple of weeks ago, this must be a really effective book since it was out of stock when I asked for it (or another line of thinking is that no one wants the book so it is never in stock)...never mind that...
I have read a few pages and it looks promising... since it is written by a person who has battled the bulge and emerged triumphant... I am sure what she has written will help me as she can empathise with my condition ...
I have also started playing badminton every weekend (starting today)...need an iron will to play tomorrow, as I am sure every muscle (even the ones I never knew existed) will be screaming for attention...so god be with me...
SO far I have done well...all the best to me for the future...
@ Sen
ReplyDeletethats why I have posted a blog just for you....http://lancelot-oneofakind.blogspot.com/2009/01/6-packs-or-8-packs-nothing-is.html just blindly follow this it works...i have a 4 pack now...
@ Lancelot...thanks... my comments...
ReplyDelete1) Cycling/Walking behind an ass - I have no intention of being classified as a desperate case :P
2) Jogging but if it is faster than you then Run... this I will do once I have lost some weight to begin with...
3) Weight Lifting... total no no... I want ot lose weight... not gain 8 packs...
4) Swimming...refer point 2
5.) Dieting- look before you eat... over my dead body...
6.) Dieting- the alternative... this can be arranged...
7.) Hiking- push your enemy... my enemies are very smart, they never accept any invitations for hiking, trekking or the like from me...
8.) Join Blue Cross- become a herbivore... again over my dead body....
9.) Forget your purse also your fat... good idea will try...
10.) Nod – the simple exercise... follow this religiously of late...
good luck with the programme.. hope someday (sounds dreamy,doesnt it?)mine starts too...
ReplyDeleteAll The Best For The Adventure ;-)
ReplyDelete@ Scrawler...thanks... I need all the luck!!!
ReplyDeleteyoyo.. some one is all set to sweat boys :P good goin!!
ReplyDelete@ Sawan...thanks... though am not sure I understand what you mean here... but I take it as "words of encouragement"...
ReplyDeleteSenorita said...
ReplyDelete@ Nav...thanks...keep me in your prayers... I sure need all the luck in the world :))
Hope you start your weight loss programme soon too!!!
Cheers, thanks for stopping by...
Sen, finally....u found a guru:) so startng today means somewhere till April 17 or grace till april 20th....v r watching u, girl...burn off those 10 kgs!!
ReplyDeletebadminton n all, cool...tomo lets run at the Mumbai marathon too...sure to lose many kgs when we return..also Milind Soumen is there ;)
Vin...the name is Milind Soman :P...yeah I know he ruus every year :P
ReplyDeleteyeah...in April I will give Kate Moss a run for her money :P
all the best, senora :)
ReplyDelete( ....we are loosing one more 'rich' looking girl :( )
All the best sen :-)
ReplyDelete@ Sen - i think u r just fine, Besides i see u almost every day believe me u aint fat. u got competition in that department from me girl. dont let lancelot 4 packs make u jealous. ;-)
ReplyDelete@ LV...thanks... you are a real sweet heart...:)
ReplyDelete@ Senorita: Good luck with your 3 months program! I started my version of project Ghajini a couple of weeks back too! It was high time I shed some kilo's!
ReplyDeleteBtw... Check out the video's of "Gold Inferno's" appearance on "So you think You can dance"... he lost over 200 pounds doing jump style dance... You should try once where no one's lookin... its great fun! lolzz
@ LV
ReplyDeleteyeah she need not worry about those 4 packs..as i am going for six packs now :P :P (Narayana Narayana...)
@ AT...thanks...and good luck to you for "Project Ghajini"...
ReplyDeletejump style dance...sounds interesting... maybe I should give it a try... if you hear of Mumbai experiencing tremors, you can rest assured that it is thanks to me dancing :P :P
@ Lancelot...I will not believe one word you say till I see tangible proof... you are lawyer after all... every other sentence you utter is a lie :P :P
ReplyDelete@ lancelot: i am with Sen on this, the strongest muscle for a lawyer is the tongue (there i m sure you will have a 8 pack)
ReplyDelete@ Sen
ReplyDelete*sticking my tongue out at you*
@ LV
give me your address need to send the defamatory suit copy :P
@ Lancelot: and why would you file a defamatory suit on me. I am an innocent, maine kuch nahi kiya...main bekasoor hoon...mujhe frame kiya jaa raha hai...Inqualab zindabad...
ReplyDeletelol... i have to lose about 20 kg [40+ lb]
ReplyDeletewhat worked for me in the past: cutting down on portion sizes; simply walking an hour a day, up and downhill, in my area
well ... all the very best to you ... do keep counting every little grams that you would be loosing ... every drop counts!
ReplyDeleteall the very best for this!!
ReplyDeletefrom my personal experienc, something that helps a lot - dont eat after 6 or at least 7. I know it is close to impossible but yet it helps a lot!
@ Laughingwolf...smaller portions, 8 glasses of water and walks are going to be kind of like the order of the day for the next three months :)
ReplyDelete@ Sush...thanks, yeah, will do :)
ReplyDelete@ Lena... thanks for the tip...will keep it in mind :)
ReplyDeleteWell well.... looks like its turning out to become a health blog! :-D Everyone's pouring their research on the matter... We all have thought of this at some point of time I guess!
ReplyDelete@AT... all advice welcome :))
ReplyDeleteso how far are you?? how about posting a weekly progress report :P
ReplyDeleteand for once, forget you are a CA, and thus dont manipulate the numbers.. right ;)
@ ST...will wait for 15 days for concrete results :)
ReplyDeletethank you, but it'll take a lot longer than a mere 3 months :O lol
ReplyDelete15 days about to finish :P
ReplyDelete@ ST...I seem unable to write these days... today I realised why... the Times has an article which says that...60% of our brain is made up of fat...with my weight watching I seem to have lost fat in my brain...so unable to write... :))
ReplyDeletehuh.. so that means.. no fat no brain.. and from last 30 years I am carrying unnecessary junk while thinking of it as brain :((
ReplyDeleteab mera kya hoga :P
@ ST : no clue about u but Sen has been showing off her new and improved FIGURE to all...
ReplyDelete@LV..shhhh... dont kill the suspense girl :P
ReplyDelete@ ST...ttera wohi hoga jo manzoor eh khuda hoga, with or without brain :))
ReplyDelete@ Sen... the suspense you want to create is safe with me. Wanted the interested audience to get a preview of the current Sen
ReplyDeleteThanx for being a regular visitor... You seem to be the only one reading my work these days :) Really appreciate it a lot! :-D
ReplyDeleteEagerly waiting for your next post...