Have you any kids ???

I have finally learnt my lesson... I hereby declare that I am no longer a Miss Goody-Two-Shoe wannabe...good samaritan acts propounded by Moral Science classes in school will be a thing of the past ... This latest incident which was a consequence of my good-samaritan-saves-the-day-for-old-lady act has absolutely converted me!!!

So here goes.

As you know I travel by auto rickshaw (driving still scares the living daylights out of me). As I rule I offer lifts to people I know and sometimes to random strangers as well. This is because I know how difficult it is to get an auto rickshaw during peak hours and also because some drivers just shoot off like scalded cats when I tell them that I want to go to Powai, it makes me feel as if I just expressed a burning desire to go to hell and take them with me. I take it that this happens to everyone so I play good samaritan by offering lifts. The other reason being, it also helps silence my nagging conscience by auto rickshaw-pooling and doing my bit for the environment.

Last week I was running late for office and with great difficulty managed to convince an auto rickshaw driver to ferry me to Powai. Just as the we were turning onto the main road, I saw Mrs. C trying to get an rickshaw. Now, Mrs.C's daughter and I went to the same school. It is like I-know-her-she-does-not-know-me, (I mean Mrs.C does not know me), but the good Samaritan in me offered her a lift and thus began my ordeal. Firstly I had to change my route to suit her destination, this added another 15 minutes to my travel time, but I decided to endure it. Big mistake!!!

Mrs. C accepted the ride and also invited another lady who I assumed was travelling with her. It was later that I realised that it was a total stranger. There we were the three of us squashed in the back seat of the rickshaw. People who know Mumbai rickshaw will realise that even though three people are legally allowed to sit in it, it is far from comfortable and if one of them happens to be a well fed farex baby types like yours truly it can get very uncomfortable indeed!!!

Somehow we managed, and it was time for small talk.

Me: Hello Auntie, I went to school with Ms.C, she was one year ahead of me.
Mrs.C: Oh, I see, what is your name? I will tell Ms.C the next time she calls. Ms.C her two darling kids and husband live in Dubai.
Me: I am Sen, good to hear that Ms.C is well settled.
Mrs.C: Yes, all my kids are well settled, my other daughter is working for XYZ company and my son works for ABC Ltd. Nice paying jobs, but, no time, the lifestyle, eating habits, always running, always busy.
Me: Yes it can get busy at times.
Mrs. C: So, How are your kids?
Me (slightly taken aback): I don't have kids.
Mrs.C: How long have you been married?
Me (furious but keeping my calm): I am not married.
Mrs.C (with a perplexed look on her face): Ms. C got married five years ago, you also should get married, it is about time, you know.
Me (rather pointedly): I will get married when I meet the right man.

About five minutes, the other lady asked the driver to stop and got off and it dawned on me that she wasn't with Mrs. C after all.

All this while Mrs.C continued to chatter about the traffic, the dust, the pollution, how difficult it was to travel, her kids, etc while I pretended to give the traffic my undivided attention. I kept nodding at regular intervals and replying in monosyllables when it was not possible to get away with nods. Finally her destination arrived and she got off but signing off in her signature style.

Mrs.C: Thank you for the lift, What were the names of your kids again?? I will tell C about you.

At this point I was willing to throw her out of the rickshaw and if in the process a truck ran over her I would surely watch in glee.

Why can’t people listen to what other say, it looks like listening was out of question for this lady as she was busy singing paeans of her super achieving kids, whose main achievement was their marital status!!!

Why do people just assume that since you are a certain age, you have to be married and have a couple of kids!!!

The next time I meet an old lady in need of a rickshaw, I will look the other way and leaving the good samaritaning to someone else!!!

Moral Science teachings will have to be forgotten!!!

From Chaand Taare to Din mein Taare...

Just before the declaration of bonus and increments the feeling usually is something like"Chaand Taare Tod Laaooon.." post declaration the feeling normally is Din mein taare...

I have listed below a collection of Din Mein Taare episodes that I have heard over the years...where the employees are reduced to "Kya se kya ho gaya, socha kya kya mila, bewafa...etc ..etc"

1) Europe Dreams...
One day prior to declaration of bonus...
A : This year I am sure to get a good sum, planning to send my parents on a Europe tour.
B : Thats cool ya, all the best.
The next day, post the Bonus Declaration Meeting(BDM) with the Big Boss.
A : Forget Europe,with this bonus Kerala seems too expensive.
B : This is pre-tax, deduct 30% to arrive at the in hand number...
A (in a pained voice) : In which case a picnic to Madh Island is all I can afford...

2) Pappu di gaddi...
One day prior to declaration of bonus
A: With this years bonus I will buy a Kinetic scooter.
The next day, post the Bonus Declaration Meeting(BDM) with the Big Boss.
A:Forget the scooter, I will not be able to afford a tyre.

3) Tu Karm kar...
Overheard in the office corridor.
A: So what plans over the weekend ?
B: Arre yaar, my sister is very depressed about the peanuts handed out to her post appraisal, will have to take her shopping or something to cheer her a bit...
A: Yeah, thats a good plan, you might need someone to cheer you once our bonuses and increments are declared.